Wulfei's Darkest Fear
by The New Ultra Mike
Summary: The final part of the Idea Central fics.
1. Sailor Moon Injustice

Note: Finally! The last of the Idea Central fics. Now I can work on something else. This is the infamous one about Wulfei's secret (or maybe secrets) that took so long because well, I felt like this should be the last fic, being the most popular. Gundam Wing and everything else does not belong to me, and remember to read and review!  
  
Wulfei's Darkest Fear  
  
The year is after Duo accidently made all the colonies blow up by pressing a button. His ass was hauled off to jail until the other pilots busted him out. Now they are all having a big celebration about it,)   
  
(Scene: Gundam pilots and many other guests are at Quatre's house which is the party location).  
  
Quatre: How come we always have to have parties at my place?   
  
Duo: Because you have the biggest house ad since your weaker then a kindergardner it wouldn't matter how much we messed it up.  
  
Quatre: It's just not fair! Not fair I tell you. (Suddenly Trowa runs to the top of the stairs, tkaes his clothes off and swan dives into the punch bowl). At least I'm no drunken basterd.  
  
Trowa: Hic! I guess... Hic! No one knows... Hic! How dry I am! Hic!  
  
Heero: Hey Quatre, where's the food?  
  
Quatre: You ate it all two hours ago!  
  
Heero: Then get some more!  
  
Quatre: Why don't you? (Heero takes his gun out) On second case, I'll go. (Runs very fast to the store).  
  
Duo: Wait a minute, something's missing.  
  
Trowa: Hic! Yeah.. Hic! The booze... Hic!  
  
Duo: No, I mean where is Wulfei? (Everybody looks around and sees Wulfei nowhere in sight).  
  
Heero: I have no idea. I guess we have to go look for him!  
  
Duo: Yeah! It could be like a scavanger hunt, except with Wulfei! (Everybody looks for him and an hour later the 3 pilots meet on the top of the stairs).  
  
Heero: Anyone have any luck finding Wulfei?  
  
Duo: No, but I did find all the Rabbawinter family jewels! Not to mention many nude pitchures of Quate!  
  
Heero: That... is well... (Turns to Trowa) Hey Trowa, you find Wulfei anywhere?  
  
Trowa: Hic... No! And I'm starting to become sober again!  
  
Heero: Well, have a beer then. (Tosses him a can that is really filled sugar water).  
  
Trowa: Thanks! (Drinks can and becomes really hyper and starts running around and screaming things like) My name is Trowa! I'm only 3 and 16 years old! I want a mexcian! I want to go to Mexico! I want candy! I want everything that begins with the letter H!  
  
Heero: I told you he was funnier on sugar. Pay the man.  
  
Duo: Next time I am giving him stronger drugs! (Hands Heero 50 dollars).  
  
Heero: Now I'm hungry again! (Quatre appears).  
  
Quatre: Hey Heero, I got your stupid nurishment!  
  
Heero: Give it to me then! (Quatre hands him a bag filled with food) Hey, these chips aren't ranch! They're fuckin sour cream. I really hate sour cream!  
  
Quatre: That's what you get when you abuse Quate Rabba- (Heero grabs hm and throws him down the stairs) You bitch!  
  
Heero: Well that's what you get for messing with Heero Yui.  
  
Duo: Even though that isn't your real name.  
  
Heero: Do you want to be thrown down the stairs?  
  
Duo: No. (Trowa runs up to them and starts jumping up and down) and would you do something about him?  
  
Heero: Oh yeah. (Grabs a peice of wood and hits him over the head with it, knocking him Unconcious). Now let's continue searching for Wulfei. (Continues search for Wulfei).  
  
Duo: Where the hell can he be? We searched everywhere.  
  
Heero: Not yet. We still need to search in there. (Points to door at end of hallway).  
  
Duo: But Heero, that;s the girl's bathroom.  
  
Heero: So what?  
  
Duo: If you think about it three questions answer your question. One; why the hell would Wulfei be in the girl's bathroom?  
  
Heero: Maybe he's planting bombs in the toilets.  
  
Duo: Two; I ain't going in the girl's bathroom.  
  
Heero: That isn;t a question.  
  
Duo: I know, but I'm not.  
  
Heero: What about if I cut off your braid and threw it in there?  
  
Duo: You wouldn't! (heero moves closer to him) okay, you would so question 3; why the hell does Quatre have a girl's bathroom in his house and he is the only one who lives here?  
  
Heero: I think you already know the answer to that one.  
  
Duo: Oh yeah! (Both go into girl's bathroom).  
  
Heero: Duo, turn the lights on.  
  
Duo: I am really getting sick of you bossing me around.  
  
Heero: If you want to life, I suggest you do so.  
  
Duo: I will kill you one of these days, fah. (Turns lights on and they find Sailor Moon). Hey, we didn't invite that bitch here! let's get her. (Runs at Sailor Moon. She easily dodges on of his punches to her face and kicks him hard in the stomach. Trowa and Quatre enter the bathroom.)  
  
Quatre: Hey, it's Sailor Moon, my idol! (Sailor Moon picks up Duo and throws him into Quatre, making both of them fall down the stairs).   
  
Trowa: Okay, what the hell is going on here? How in the fucking name of Heero's dick-  
  
Heero: Something only Zero may touch I might add.  
  
Trowa: Could that bitch be that strong? Sure Quatre's a wuss and duo's only a bit stronger, even they should be able to whoop her ass no problemo.  
  
Heero: Beside the fact Sailor Moon should be dead.* (See Sailor Uranus and Neptune's Gay talk Show Part 2).  
  
Trowa: Yeah, but that would mean you also should be dead.  
  
Heero: Will you shut up about that?  
  
Trowa: Give me a dollar. (Quatre and Duo enter again).  
  
Duo: You ain't beating us this time, bitch.  
  
Sailor Moon: I have had enough of this charade! (Takes off clothes and is revealed to be!).  
  
Duo, Quatre, Heero and Trowa: Wulfei?! (Scream for several hours).  
  
Wulfei: Will you shut up?! (They shut up) I know this is shocking to you, but to carry on for eight hours is really degrating.  
  
Duo: But you're Sailor Moon.  
  
Wulfei: Did you just realize that?  
  
Quatre: And you're naked.  
  
Wulfei: Whoops! (Buts regular clothes on) I suppose you want to know how I became the figure called Sailor Moon.  
  
Heero: Well we definatley don't want total pacificism.  
  
Wulfei: Here is the tale. (Fashbacks to first sailor Moon episode).  
  
Sailor Moon: (After being asked who she is by monster) I am uhhh. Sailor Moon and I- (Falls of Ledge she was standing on and dies).  
  
Director: Cut! Cut! Cut! (Set is lightened so you can see the production crew) This is the 38th one that died today. It's really only a two feet fall, how can anyone die from that.  
  
Director2: This "Frail girl who is incredibly dumb and ugly" crap really isn't working. We need someone who can actually do all these stunts and not die so easily. (Wulfei walks by).  
  
Wulfei: (Singing) Injustice! Injustice! The action of the weak. Injustice! Injustice! This song is freaking sweet. I-N-J-U-S-T-ICE! Injustce! The accttioon offffffff theeeeeeeeeeeeeee weak! (Starts humming song repeatdley).  
  
Director: Hey! You guys thinking what I'm thinking?  
  
Director3: Yeah, but do the white curtains really go with the blue ones? (Get's strangled to death by Director 2).  
  
Director 2: We also don't need a third director on this staff either!  
  
Director: Agreed. Hey yo, wait up, Injustice Boy! (Run to him. Later in the Director's office).  
  
Wulfei: You can just fuck that idea!  
  
Director: But Mr Wulfei, we really need someone to play this Character.  
  
Wulfei: I am not ruining my image by being a stupid Sailor scout. In fact I should kill you all just for saying that.  
  
Director2: We'll give you a lot of money.  
  
Wulfei: No.  
  
Director: (Whispers to Director2) I have an idea. (Speaks normal) Come on, we should no this is not the guy to fight for justice.  
  
Wulfei: You really think you can fool me with that reverse pyschology shit?  
  
Director2: Oh no, we could never fool you with that.  
  
Wulfei: You can't fool me with reverse-reversepyschology either.   
  
Directors: Damn it!  
  
Wulfei: Goodbye. (Starts to leave).  
  
Director: Wait! You can also have Meacury as one of your sex slaves.  
  
Wulfei: Huh? (Stops) Make it Jupiter and Meacury and we have a deal.  
  
Directors: Okay! (End flashback).  
  
Wulfei: And that's how I became Sailor Moon.  
  
Duo: but what about the orange master? How did he escape the clutches of the Russian Penquins?  
  
Wulfei: Sometimes you scare me Duo.  
  
Trowa: At least we don't have to be part of a stupid anime show to have some sex!  
  
Wulfei: No, you're jst going to be part of it because I'm making you.  
  
Heero: What the hell you talking bout Wulfei?  
  
Wulfei: The other scouts are sick and we need someone to play there parts, namley you guys.  
  
Trowa: I am not being no scout of love. (Wulfei knocks him uncioncious with an double over head fist).   
  
Wulfei: The rest of you better come along quietley or end up like Trowa.  
  
Heero: Oh no! I am not dressing up like a girl again* (See Operaton: Kill the Bitch).  
  
Quatre: What about pleasing Zero?  
  
Heero: I meant in public, dumbass.  
  
Quatre: You do it on a public street corner.  
  
Heero: Duo, you basterd! You said no one live there.  
  
Duo: It's not my fault you believed me.  
  
Heero: I am really sick of you! (Cuts off his braid and throws it out the window).  
  
Duo: Not the Braid! (Chases out of window after it. Grabs braid in mid air and falls to the ground. Gets up and runs into house, up the stairs and in the bathroom.) You better not do that again, seriously.  
  
Heero: Like I'm ever going to listen to you anymore. (Grabs braid and again throws it out the window. Duo repeats the process but this time super glue's the braid to his head).  
  
Duo: Now try and get it!  
  
Heero: Bitch. Anyway, I am not and you can not make me.  
  
Wulfei: If you don't I'll show that pitchure of you raping Quatre.  
  
Heero: That;s not fair! I was drunk.  
  
Wulfei: It still counts. Even someone who drank 2000 gallons of beer would know not to do that.  
  
Heero: Fine, but I call Sailor Jupiter.  
  
Wulfei: Sorry, but Miliarado Peacecraft has that part.  
  
Trowa (Who regained conciounous about two minutes ago): Now that is a lie!  
  
Wulfei: Oh yeah? Come out, Zechs! (Zechs comes out wearing Sailor Jupiter outfit).  
  
Zechs: I hope you realize now I hate you more then Heero.  
  
Heero: (Laughing uncontrollably along with the other three pilots) How the hell did he convince you?  
  
Zechs: Let's just say anytime I have se in the near future, I am locking all the doors and windows.  
  
Heero: I should do that when I rape Quatre.  
  
Quatre: That isn't nice Heero.  
  
Heero: Shut up bitch (Wulfei throws him Sailor Venus outfit) God damn, why am I the one that represents the love planet.  
  
Wulfei: Something to do with the fact of your affair with Reelena.  
  
Zechs: You mean he had sex with my sister?  
  
Trowa: Yeah, but he eventually killed her.  
  
Zechs: Way to go Heero! (High fives him).  
  
Wulfei: Go on, Heero, put it on. (Heero grumbles, but puts on costume). Quatre, you are Meacury since you so weak and smart and other shit like her.  
  
Quatre: Why should I? (Hits him in the head three times). I hate being the weakest. (Puts on the outfit).  
  
Wulfei: Trowa, you are Mars because of the way you act like her (Trowa looks at Wulfei very evily and puts on costume). And Duo you are-  
  
Duo: The God of Death, I kow.  
  
Wulfei: No, I mean sailor wise.  
  
Duo: Am I Tuexdo mask?  
  
Wulfei: No, Treize is.  
  
Duo: Treize is supposed to be dead* (In episode 48, Wulfei killed him). And can we stop it with the notes? They're stupid now.* (Don't make me come down there).  
  
Wulfei: Yeah,well Treize wanted to be Tuexdo mask so much that I wished him back to do the job.  
  
Treize: (Appears in Tuexdo mask outfit) Did not! You said you would erase me if I didn't.  
  
Wulfei: Well, it dosen't matter the reason, but the point is that Duo is Mini Moon. (Forces him into Mini Moon Costume).  
  
Duo: This is way to tight! Couldn't you have made it bigger.  
  
Wulfei: Yes, but we didn't. (Puts on Sailor Moon costume) Let's go scouts!  
  
Treize: (Whispers to everyone put Wulfei) When this is over, remind me to rip off that guy's head.  
  
Duo: Then I get to do it.  
  
Zechs: Then me.  
  
Heero: Then me.  
  
Trowa: Then me.  
  
Quatre: Then me.  
  
Heero: You're too much of a weakass, Quatre.  
  
Other guys: Yeah!  
  
Quatre: I am going to scream like a girl if you guys don't stop picking on me.  
  
Duo: That would be good pratice for your character.  
  
Wulfei: Are we going to go or not?  
  
Trowa (Normal voice) : I guess.  
  
Wulfei: No, we all have to say yeah at the same time.  
  
Zechs: But we already did.  
  
Wulfei: I mean yell it and I didn't here you.  
  
Treize: That was becuase we said- (Heero stomps on his foot).  
  
Heero (Whispers) : Not now, fagott!  
  
Treize (Whispers): Sorry.  
  
Wulfei: Come on then, say it.  
  
Everyone: Yeah! (Run out of house and about 1000 feet then stop).  
  
Duo: Where the hell are we going?  
  
Wulfei: To fight Queen Beryll.  
  
Quatre: Isn't she in the North Pole?  
  
Wulfei: Yeah! And...?  
  
Quatre: And why are we heading south?  
  
Wulfei: I know a shortcut, that's why.  
  
Heero: Shortcuts only work when you travel the way you're supposed to be heading.  
  
Treize: Why are we walking? Don't they have a helicopter for this?  
  
Wulfei: No, that's only for the Outer Scouts.  
  
Zechs: I hate walking. But I hate you even more.  
  
Trowa: Can't argue with that. (Start walking to North Pole, 5 days later, they arrive there)  
  
Quatre: Odd, it should at least take one year to walk to the North Pole.  
  
Heero: I would not care evn if you did show people what I did with Zero, Wulfei, but I am definatley not spending a year in this suit.  
  
Duo: Hey, at least you ain't squeezed in a 6 year old outfit.  
  
Wulfei:: Were almost there, look, the fortress. (Group runs over to building). Hey you in there, open up! (Elf opens up). Okay Beryll, prepare to-  
  
Elf: What the hell's your problem lady?  
  
Wulfei: I'm a guy!  
  
Elf: Oh, that's the problem.  
  
Duo: Hey Wulfei, this is Santa's Workshop.  
  
Wulfei: Why did you tell me this now, and not beforehand.  
  
Elf: Who the hell are you guys supposed to be anyways?  
  
Quatre: Actually, were supposed to be the Gundam pilots. But were dressed up like Sailor Scouts because Wulfei made us.  
  
Trowa: Oh, why not tell the whole neighborhood why don't you.  
  
Elf: This is basically the neighborhood. (Yells to everyone in workshop) Hey guys! The gundam pilots dress up like Sailor Scouts! (Everyone in workshop laughs).  
  
Trowa: That's not really so funny.  
  
Elf: I would say that too if I was dressed up like you.  
  
Wulfei: Can you just tell me where Queen Beryll's fortress is?  
  
Elf: It's right next to you (See a fortress with the words "Queen Beryll's hideout).  
  
Wulfei: I knew that.  
  
Elf: Then Happy Holidays... homosexuals! (Quickly closes door).  
  
Duo: Hey, how many shopping days till Christmas anyways.  
  
Zechs: Fivfysomething, why?  
  
Duo: I need Santa that I need to get a new pogostick!  
  
Trowa: Like you even play with them! All you do is smash them against people's mailboxes.  
  
Duo: I still need a new one though.  
  
Zechs: I need a torturing device... to get revenge on Wulfei!  
  
Wulfei: First we have to kill Beryll. (Group runs over to fortreaa) Alright Beryll, open up!  
  
Heero: Like she is going to open up! (Doors open up). Okay, so she's dumber then I thought. (All walk in and eventually end up inside central part of fortress).  
  
Treize: Haha! Take that! (Throws a rose).  
  
Wulfei: Why the hell did you do that?  
  
Treize: You mean she wasan't there! It's to dark to see in here.  
  
Duo: Maybe if you took those fucking glasses off you could see.  
  
Treize: I don't want anyone to regonize me.  
  
Trowa: Just take them off! (Takes off his glasses and breaks them).  
  
Heero: So, what this Beryll look like? (Beryll appears, but is really Reelena). You mean she's the peacecraft bitch looking type?  
  
Wulfei: That is Reelena! Beryll got sick too, so Reelena subsituted her. Makes sense, a bitch for an even bigger one.  
  
Reelena: Time to get revenge on you Heero for killing me!  
  
Heero: Die again, megabitch! (Pulls out gun and shoots her and kiills her. Then shoots her several more times for the hell of it).  
  
Wulfei: That's my job, stupid!  
  
Heero: Screw you! (Suddenly Reelena's dead body transformed into a bigger and uglier form). When the fuck could she do that? Oh well! (Shoots her, but the bullets just delfect off of it. Then Heero throws his gun at her and whacks her face, but causes no damage. Then Reelena smacks Heero with her big hand and makes him go to the other side of the room). Damn! Now what do I do?  
  
Wulfei: Use Venus's attacks, retard.  
  
Heero: What was that again? Oh yeah, Loveshitty Rope Crap Encircle (Attack comes out but Reelena just grabbs it and throws Heero against the other wall). The Um Cresxent stuff attack thingy! (Just deflects off monster).  
  
Treize: Now it's rose time! (Throws rose at monster and does no damage to it). Stupid attack! Why don't I breath fire at it?  
  
Wulfei: Tuexdo mask can't breath fire, and neither can you.  
  
Duo: My turn! Pink Sugar Heart Attack! (Nothing comes out).  
  
Zechs: Haha! You suck,dude. (Duo points it at him and attack comes out and hurts Zechs) Can you turn that shitty thing to the bitch, not me.  
  
Duo: Well, that's what you get when you mess with the God of Death turned adorable chibi cute girl solider scout of the future! (Aims it at Reelena and does some damage, but eventually weas down). Fucking cheap batteries! Just when I was having fun!  
  
Trowa: Now, me! Fireball! (Throes fireball at Reelena's tits, making her scream in pain. Reelena Retaliates by breathing fire at Trowa and burning him bad).  
  
Quatre: I'll save you Trowa! Aqua Illusion (Water comes out and puts the flame out on Trowa).  
  
Trowa: Thanks, but never save me again!  
  
Quatre: Why?  
  
Trowa: It makes me look like a fucking wuss!  
  
Quatre: Yeah, well you were going to die!  
  
Trowa: I don't care. (Reelena breaths ice on Quatre) Help, Trowa, save me!  
  
Trowa: No! I don't care if you die.  
  
Zechs: Sumpreme thunder ball attack! (Shocks monster Reelena, but she just shakes it off and kicks him into a wall). Ow! Someone give me a band daid, stat!  
  
Wulfei: Later. Moon Sceptor Elimination! (Kills Reelena).  
  
Heero: How come your attack works but mine dosen't?  
  
Wulfei: That's how the Animation works.  
  
Heero: This show sucks.  
  
Trowa: Well at least it's over, and look, Quatre's dead. (Quatre is Frozen and dead like in a icecube).   
  
Wulfei: Now let's get out of these clothes and go get some snow cones.  
  
Heero: Wait! I learned something today. It dosen't matterwhat you wear on the outside, but what you wear on the inside.  
  
Trowa: What the hell does that mean?  
  
Heero: Aw fuck it! (All take off Sailor Uniforms and change back into regualr clothes).  
  
Treize: Well this isn't so bad.  
  
Zechs: Yeah! At least we don't have to be in the Dubbed version of Endless Waltz.  
  
Trowa: That's right! No, wait! We do have to! (All start screaming very loudly).  
  
The End  
  
Note: If you want a sequeal, but it in the review. If I get over 5 I'll make one (And that goes for any Idea Central story). 


	2. Why No More

Why No more- There will only be a sequal to Wulfei's Drakest fear. Despite the fact it was the most voted viewer's requet, it had the worst ratings, so I'm sinking it. 


End file.
